Divorce very messy to move or not to move?
Samantha B asked:
I am 26 yrs old almost 27 and my hubby is 28 yrs old we are getting a divorce after 4 yrs of marriage. I was 22 and a single mom of a daughter(now 6 yrs old) via an ex.bf which was a very messy and I wanted to be wild party girl and thats how my hubby met me we got married after 7 months of dating.Its been an on/off tirbulent marriage for 4 yrs he never stopped being the party guy and cheated on me more than once.It was bad i wondered what i was doing wrong and i was depressed.During our last seperation i slept with my daughters father who was also seperated from his new wife and got pregnant with twins who are now little over 18 months old.I did graduate from college with a liberal arts major and a business minor all my parents choices.I never used any of it though because i stopped working when i got married so my last job was at age 21 was as a yoga instructor.I live in NV but am considering moving back to my home state(NJ) to be near family but its expensive?
My home is sold and i have to move out in 2 weeks.I dont want to uproot my eldest daughter and make things hard on her by pulling her out of school?But her dad lives in same area as my family so no daycare?
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Filed Under Parenting |
Tagged With 7 Months, Daycare, Getting A Divorce
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7 Responses to “Divorce very messy to move or not to move?”
Yikes. Your daughter is young so moving her to a different area and school would probably be easier now rather than later. Do what works best for all of you
Wow… sounds like a soap opera, forgive me for sayin’!!!
I’d say that if your daughter’s school is the only thing keeping you in NV, then go where family is. Your current husband has no parental rights over all three of your children (unless he legally adopted them), so there’s no reason to have him around. So, it may be hard, but it’s time to move on.
I kinda get a feeling that part of why you want to move to NJ is to close to the x-boyfriend again though. Just warning you (’cause I’ve been there), DO NOT jump into another relationship with your x-bf yet!! Wait until your divorce is final, and you get settled with a job and a house, etc, and get your oldest daughter settled back into school. Okay? Also, make sure it’s worth the effort on his part as well - is he a good match for you? Explore the reasons why you separated in the first place and see that if he hasn’t changed, that you want to handle that again. Make sure he’s a GOOD dad.
And just to let you know - the cost of living might be more expensive in NJ than NV, but remember that the salary increase is more too. It’s relative to what the area costs.
Good luck!
i say move back home. you will have more help there and you can get your life on track. even though you haven’t worked in your field yet doesn’t mean you can’t start now you haven’t been out of college that long. when they ask why you have such a gap just tell them that you took some time off to be a mom and now your ready to get back to working. good luck.
I will say to move back look for a job and for daycare help ( Child care services can be helpful). If the father of your kids live in that same area will be ok so they can be closed by but just them as his kids as for you I will suggest you to move on work hard for your kids filed for child support so you can be ok economically and maybe later on a better man will come by and will accept you with your 3 kids.. Besides being close to your family will be much easier to start again !! Good luck and best wishes!!
you gotta do what is best you you too. because your daughter is so young it is easier to move her now rather then later. She should be fine. Best of Luck to you. Neither choice can be very easy.
Id say move back to where you know everyone. Family can be very important at a time like this and can help you until you get back on your feet again.
Im in AWE… speechless….
This could have been me… if I didnt make the life changing choices your about to make… I would still be in the “so called “hole” that was my life”….
you need to make a big descision…. something that will better your family… and better you… Consider your children at all times… if it looks expensive…. it could be better in the long run..
It was for me
Good luck!!